Coding is a good job if you love it or just got interested in it. If you see no meaning in it, find another job, but if you see some, learn it step-by-step. It's like any other job will start rewarding you, but unlike the others, it'll do it exponentially. Like "the more you give, the more you get**2"

Don't kill yourself. I feel the same. Coding is hard. Just take it slowly and you'll see improvements. It doesn't need to become your life. Take it one step at a time