haha

If it makes you feel better, I spent a long time on this too and it wasn't my first solution for this kata.

I was already embarrased at how long this took me. Then I submit it only to see your solution...
Thanks for making me feel like a complete failure.

...Now where did I put my f$%king cigerettes?

Only small thing I noticed was when I copied the example from the brief. There's a missing closing bracket in the veteran object.

var veteran = Object.create(citizen, {panic: function(){
return "SNAFU";
}
} // Here
);

Just a heads up. Otherwise, it's good! I haven't quite cracked the full solution yet, but that's my fault! :(